Blog

  I woke up the other day, and it was 60 degrees. I put on a light sweater. Now, I recognize in other parts of the country and world, this might signify something vastly different.    But here in Texas, where the highs have been in the mid and upper 90s for weeks (and this has been a mild summer overall) and the upper 70s at night, dipping down into the 60s is cause for celebration and busting out the boots and scarves and pumpkin-flavored everythings!   I love these in-between times. Where the season ahead begins to poke through. At first, it only whispers its name in the wind and disappears, leaving you wondering whether you ever heard it [...]

  When was the last time you took a breath, paused, and really felt into and celebrated how far you’ve come?    Our culture has a predilection towards the BIG moments. The before and after stories. The turning point, after which nothing was the same.    We can see this in the language that we use:    “I used to think/believe/be blah blah blah, and then…I woke up.”   There it is. The turning point. The one moment in time when you went from A to B. From asleep to awake. Like a machine, you were off and now you’re on.   I am fairly certain I have used some version of this myself, and probably not that long ago. [...]

  One of the most common pitfalls on the journey of shedding our Good Girl patterns of pleasing and performance is to start hating on our Good Girl.    In my experience, I never set out to be the Good Girl. In fact, that archetype did not resonate with me at all. I have found the same thing to be true for the majority of women that I work with.    I was an artist. A feminist. A non-conformist.    Good Girls are cookie cutter women who obey all the rules.    They are banal.    Downright boring. Truly, a Good Girl was probably one of the last things on earth that I wanted to be or associated myself with.   [...]

  I had a dream a few weeks ago that I was walking through what had once been a lush old-growth forest. While some trees remained, tall and straight as pillars, all of the undergrowth, the whole forest floor, had been cleared. There was no moss or decaying tree trunks for little creatures to call home, no ferns or mushrooms sprouting in the shadows. All the gnarled trees had been removed. In the dream, I sensed that this whole forest was being “harvested”. I was horrified and started to cry, yelling, “Why have you done this?!?”   Then I woke up.    Of course dreams are often indicative of our own inner wilds, and the “Why have you done this” [...]

  I took this spring (mostly) off of social media. I needed a break; you can read about it here.    Now I am dipping my toes back into the world of socials, but I am treading slowly. Deliberately. More consciously. And only time will tell if I can find a way to exist and share my work in this sphere in a way that feels authentic, nourishing, and creative.    Recently, one main realization that has been bubbling to the surface is this:    My life is not for consumption.    Let me explain.    Since I started my coaching practice in 2014, the line between me/my life and my work has become very blurred. Part of generating “content” [...]

  “Attention is the Beginning of Devotion” - Mary Oliver   My husband and I spent the latter half of 2020 starting our days off with a Mary Oliver poem. We slowly worked our way through Devotions, a compilation of her work, while we sipped on our morning coffees and I couldn’t help but give Sophie little pieces of my toast.    One of the themes that pulses through Ms. Oliver’s work (I will resist calling her Mary, though I almost feel like she is an old friend or long lost soul mentor) is closeness to life. Her devotion to the natural world reverberates through every word, line, and metaphor, and this devotion is grounded in her ability to pay [...]

  People pleasing is a hallmark symptom of being trapped in the Good Girl energy.    If you have been following my writing for a while now, you are probably well-aware of the detriments of chronic people pleasing.    Losing your sense of self, and your connection with your own desires and needs. Never feeling present in your relationships.  Feeling like a chameleon, who slightly morphs and shifts based upon who you’re around.  Not being able to show up as your authentic self.  Despite having friends, never feeling fully seen or heard.    I could go on.    But, people pleasing is only an effective strategy as long as you’re good at it.    And what makes someone good at [...]

  Last week in my coaching mentorship, I learned a new word. I have to say, I derive a very specific type of joy from learning a new word. It’s as if a concept that once seemed amorphous and difficult to grasp suddenly has been given shape and gravity.    Has become more real.    Like, “Oh there is a word for that thing!”   The word that I learned is arational, and it speaks so clearly to my journey and the work that I do in the world.    For many years, I hungered for a more poetic and soulful life, a life rich with meaning and magic. Part of the reason that it felt difficult and fairly consistently [...]

  A few weeks ago, I decided to embark upon an experimental journey: taking a bit of a social media hiatus.    When I started tapping my paper planner, expecting it to burst to life and give me news like my phone does, I knew it was high time for a break...   Now as a person with a small business, stepping away from social media, even for a limited time, can be seen as dangerous. What if I become irrelevant? Lose followers? How will people find me?    And yet the call was there and I knew that I needed to heed it.    I have been posting regularly for years. What I had discovered happening more often in [...]

For a long time, I took my inner voice for granted.   It was just there; I never stopped to ponder where it came from or what it was telling me.    It was me and I was it.    I feel like this is the case for many of us. There is no separation between ourselves and our inner voice. There is also no separation between our inner voice and the truth.    So often, we believe our own thoughts 100%. We are certain that they are telling us the truth, but that’s not always the case.    My inner voice used to be critical and self-conscious, with a tendency to be controlling and judgmental, both of myself and [...]